While you’re out enjoying yourself over the festive period, spare a thought for us in retail and some of the issues that we face on a daily basis.
Having to listen to the same Christmas CD on repeat from November.
Being made to offer gift cards at any opportunity and then being shocked when someone actually says yes. Are you sure?
You don’t know pain until you’ve stabbed yourself trying to ticket sale with one of these bastards.
People will leave all sorts in the changing room – used tampons, condoms and pee – I’ve had to clean it all. Why are people so disgusting?
Speaking of fitting rooms, feel free just to leave behind everything you’ve tried on, we’ll go in and rehang them for you, don’t worry. Pricks.
Getting home at 1 in the morning on a Saturday, not because you left the club early but because you were selling polo shirts to a guy who only likes neutral colours.
When you let someone know that their size isn’t in store, or online, and you have phoned every other store on the planet and it still ain’t there. Then they just stand there staring at you, hoping you’re going to go out the back and sew one.
When you ask someone if they need help and they patch you so you look around to see if anyone heard and casually walk away.
Having that one insufferable colleague/manager who gets too much into the spirit and prances around reminding everyone to smile because it’s Christmas. Just fuck off.
When you finally get a 15 minute break to yourself and a customer asks you to find them a present for their Auntie, cousin and dog. Excuse me, can’t you see I’m busy?
And when you finally get away from them you have to walk a certain route through the store to avoid customers. Just let me leave.
The Christmas temps who you have to train while also doing your own job. Then by the time they’re actually useful, it’s time for them to go again.
Being left to baby sit crying children throwing tantrums at the fitting room while their parents try on clothes: please don’t.
Going into work hungover after all your Christmas nights out because Sunday is just another working day to you.
While waiters and bar staff get tips for dealing with your shite, we don’t. We are grafting all day on minimum wage trying to give you the best experience possible, so the least you can do is get off your phone while we are serving you on the till.
Come the end you’ll be so broken that you’ll apologise to everyone and anything. Walk into a clothing fixture…”sorry”.
While everyone is out being merry on Christmas eve, we are working late setting up for the dreaded boxing day sale.
And then having to be in early to greet a queue of customers on Boxing Day morning while nursing our Christmas day hangover.
While on the topic of Boxing Day, you haven’t seen mayhem until you’ve seen two grown women fighting over the last pair of Molly’s.
Telling a customer for the 10,000th time that we have our entire sale out.
When in fact you have that lovely jacket in the size 10 they’re looking for through the back on hold for you to buy at the end of your shift. There are some perks in the job I guess!
Explaining to customers countless times on Boxing Day that the fitting rooms are shut despite there being a 5 foot sign explaining it right in front of them.
And then watching that one guy attempt to try on his stuff anyway in the corner. Mate, we can see you, put it away.
The women who pick up a dress six sizes too big/small for them and instead of putting it back, they dump it on the floor right in front of you. Don’t worry about that: it’s our job to pick up after you.
You’ll spend all day tidying sale and when you finally get that wall looking good. Some bitch of a customer will come along and destroy your hard work within two minutes.
Being made to work extra hours if you like it or not: who really wants to shop at midnight?
But fair play to the managers who make the rota’s and then have to listen to us all moaning about how we can’t work X, Y and Z.
But the worst part is being made smile through it all.